I’m late to the party but I’m still fairly new at this blogging thing. Apparently it’s April Fools day and people love, love, love, themed based articles, sooooo…. I thought I’d gather, a list of things I experience every April Fools day, in hopes that someone out there has the same nightmare that I do.
Full disclosure: I may or may not be guilty of doing one or all of these.
1. Everyone will be ‘pregnant’.
Ah yes, there’s nothing like April Fools to bring out all the unexpected pregnancies that are hard to believe but fool so many. Here’s a little hint, that sonogram isn’t theirs, chances are they ripped it off the Internet. If you are announcing your pregnancy today, I feel happy and sorry for you, happy because….baby! Sorry because chances are you’ll probably have to re-announce your bundle of love in a few days time when people will 1. Believe you and 2. You won’t have to share your thunder with the 8 billion + other people also announcing their real but not real pregnancy.
2. Someone will get ‘engaged’.
Why people think it’s a hilarious joke to announce their engagement is beyond me. Do they not realize they’re seriously playing ‘boy who cried wolf’ and essentially taking away the genuine excitement and sentiment of when they announce their engagement for real? If I had a pound for every time someone on my Facebook announced a fake engagement…well… I’d buy Facebook and delete them from it. But seriously, some people do this joke every year and one year it will be real and no one will believe them and they’ll be just so upset, it wasn’t funny the first year, it wasn’t funny the second year, 5 years on it’s still NOT FUNNY.
3. People will suddenly remember ‘pinch punch first of the month’
Oh you probably forgot right? Did I just remind you? You’re welcome.
4. Someone will forget April Fools ends at 12:00pm.
Whilst everyone is enjoying their hilarious pranks, remember that April Fools has a curfew and it’s not socially acceptable to be playing any April Fools specialized jokes when the clock strikes Midday.
5. Someone will have some amazing news that will fool his or her parents.
There’s always that bastard who doesn’t mess around with childish practical jokes and goes straight in for the kill with a carefully strategic, much planned lie of all lies! Grandma will believe you’ve had a kid with a prostitute, your Dad will believe you’re a drug lord…just watch out what you’re telling and to who, the world is a crazy place and you never know who will believe what you’re saying.
6. A load of trolls will share things on Facebook that people will blindly follow, like and share.
I sadly was a victim of blindly sharing and liking something completely false and the guilt and shame you feel when you believe is something that even a bar of soap cannot wash away. Be prepared for Facebook walls full of landmines of lies, the ones that are particularly clever are the ones that tug at your heartstrings and makes you feel! They ask for sympathy for made up tragedies and get you with all the spam!!! Also fan pages of extreme and deplorable organizations, they’ll probably be on full power releasing things that will encourage you to argue with everyone (just remember the person behind it is probably your grandma sitting maniacally, she’s probably not into the BNP but she just finds it funny watching the internet at war).
7. The biggest celebrity ‘death’ total will occur, and all these celebrities will have to answer to their distraught family members.
Oh Internet you sly dog. Why is it April Fools is that time of the year when so many celebrities ‘die’ you’d think people would be smarter than that, but they’re not. I cried for hours when I thought Jackie Chan died… honestly death isn’t funny, so when someone ‘dies’ on April Fools my first thought isn’t ‘Oh this must be a joke!’.
8. Someone will take a joke too far.
We all have that one friend who believes everything (I’m that friend). We also have that one friend who doesn’t know when to quit, so their joke becomes almost believable, and they’re so adamant that its funny that they keep up with it, even past 12pm, and pretty soon their living the life of their joke, they’ve left their husband and kids, just to prove to you that the joke was that great.
10. Someone will post an annoyed negative message about all the idiotic things they’ve seen on the internet people have done, and then go on to suck the joy out of fun, laughter and spirit.
Despite my tone for this blog post, I actually love April Fools! It’s great fun when it’s innocent and just good, lighthearted banter. There will always be negative Nancy’s that want to suck the fun out of everything and will be ever present on our computer screens to remind us that we’re all adults and should be acting this way…these people are often the reason why kids don’t believe in Santa Claus, why the birds stop chirping, and the inspiration behind your Mum’s favorite quote ‘this is why we can’t have nice things’. These people are often the way they are because they were badly burned by an April Fools Joke, perhaps they took it seriously when no one else did? Or maybe they were just born miserable?
11. Someone will have forgotten that it is April Fools day and take everything and anything seriously.
“That’s the fifth person announcing their pregnancy…well it has been a cold winter!”
Have a happy and safe April Fools everyone!
Do something to make your parents proud today, your kids proud someday, and you proud everyday!
Peace and Love,
p.s. I missed out number 9…did you notice? APRIL FOOLS…
update: my friend told me this isn’t how April Fools works.